Thoughts on Guys Who Give up on Dating: MRAs, MGTOWs, and the Manosphere

The manosphere – for those of you not in the know – is a collection of blogs written by men, for men. Their complaint is generally that women (especially American women) are awful. They’re too picky. They’re too independent. They’re not feminine. They’re not appreciative. They’re emasculating. They’re ball-busting. And these men are sick of it.

Thus, MGTOW: “men going their own way,” and MRA’s: “men’s rights activists.”

These men are angry and frustrated with women, and instead of turning inward, they spend their time talking about how women are useless except for sex, only worthwhile when they’re in their 20’s, and are generally better in places like Thailand, where many of them have gone to get laid or pick up a bride. One thing is for sure about MGTOWs: they want you to know that they are not losers. In their minds, they are the guys who have it all figured out in the dating world. The ones who took the “red pill” of truth, like in the Matrix. They frequently talk about how much money they make, how strong they are, how much younger their girlfriends are. They use big words like “hypergamy” to illustrate their intellect.   If you disagree with them, you are a feminist, a gold digger, or worse, a “mangina.”

The manosphere is like the feminist blogosphere. They have some very valid ideas that are dwarfed by their monolithic thinking and negativity towards women.

For a long time, I’ve wanted to write a blog about the guys who give up on dating.  But you know what? Every time I think about it, it feels like a time suck. So, without further ado, let me share this well written blog post with you that does my job for me.

The short version of the above link is this:

The manosphere is like the extreme wing of the feminist blogosphere. They have some very valid ideas that are dwarfed by their monolithic thinking and negativity towards women. It’s not that MRA’s are “bad,” it’s that you can almost hear their impotence in every word they type. They turn a stereotype into a caricature. Suddenly, it’s not a   complaint about some women, it’s a complaint about all women. Go to a MGTOW blog and every post dissects women and tries to explain how psychologically screwed up they are, instead of trying to understand and empathize with them.

Part of the reason I feel so strongly about this blog is because I take great pains to provide validation, insight, and empathy. Are women correct when they complain about men? Sometimes. But sometimes you’re not. Sometimes, you’re making a big deal about nothing. Sometimes, you are the common denominator in your own problems. This doesn’t seem to have dawned on the manosphere – that women may be reacting negatively to them as individuals as opposed to “women are selfish.”

You know how I tell women to trust men, see the best in men, be a more generous girlfriend and choose men of greater integrity? I would tell the MGTOWs to do the exact same thing. Their complaints about women may be somewhat valid, but so what? Eventually, you have to look in the mirror and ask why your choice of partners is so consistently disappointing. The bottom line is to choose different women instead of spending 24/7 talking about how much women suck.

Your thoughts on MRAs, MGTOWs and other male-centric acronyms, are appreciated below.